What will it take for child care issues to really matter in our countries? What do we need to do before employers are compelled to be there, really be there for their employees?
How many more mother’s need to be in a bind like Sametta Heyward before something changes for the better?
A mother working for her children, doing what she thinks is the right thing-working. Scared to call in sick maybe, since most employers don’t take into account that a VERY large % of us cannot just call a relative to take our kids, that some of us are all we’ve got.
She’s be crucified as “that black lady who locked her kid in the car”. She’ll likely be denigrated for making a deadly and horrible mistake. She’s be forgotten in a week or so because she’s poor, she’s black and she’s a single mother who shouldn’t have had those kids anyway, right?
If this was a white woman, would we judge her differently? If this was a white woman, would someone start to care?
Spin Me I Pulsate 
Oh, thank you (as always) for saying what I’ve been thinking (but if I actually blogged about I’d have an inbox full of angry e-mails from family members).
My heart breaks when I hear this story – for the children, and for that mom. Did she make a huge, horrible mistake? Of course. But the grief she obviously felt – she asked the cops to kill her – and the position she was in – I feel for her so deeply, too.
She thought if she didn’t go to work, well, her kids might starve. If she did, well, we see what happened. What’s a poor single mother to do?
The system sucks.
Honestly, if she was a white woman, I don’t think the story would change. If she was white and had to leave her kid in the car, she would be pretty poor. And nobody gives a shit about poor people. Not the media or the government. She’d just be spun as poor white trash who should keep her legs closed until she can afford those babies. I could be wrong, but marginal is marginal.
that is so utterly tragic. and i agree w/ radicalmama…its a class issue too – no one cares how poor people survive as long as its out of everybody’s way. this is horrible.
true, and maybe that’s more where I was trying to go while Vivian and Rosalyn were clambering around me, since it is true. (Note to self-don’t write posts with kids around)
Not a race issue.
Not the system necessarily… What ever happened to it takes a village? We no longer know our neighbours or volunteer to help out in a bind. Which is something I have done lately, I have reached out. Thing is people look at you like you are nuts because you want to make life easier for others.the instinct is, well then you’ll be one up on me I’ll owe you something. …
When will we realise that we are all in this together? Waiting in line, working hard for a buck,keeping our sanity and our health. This isn’t a competition when will we lower our guard and start relying on others? Asking for help? Offering help?
I think a look at our Grandparents might be in order here.
oh dear g-d…I did not need to read that….I can barely hold back the tears…..
Sametta Heyward fits into that “uniquely American” category that George W. Bush is so proud of:
(February 4, 2005, Omaha, Nebraska; George W. Bush holds a forum on social security reform):
MS. MORNIN: …I work three jobs and I feel like I contribute.
PRESIDENT BUSH: You work three jobs?
MS. MORNIN: Three jobs, yes.
PRESIDENT BUSH: Uniquely American, isn’t it? I mean, that is fantastic that you’re doing that. (Applause.) Get any sleep? (Laughter.)
..
Some people will assume I’m trying to blame these kids’ awful deaths on President Bush. Go on and assume that if you’re so inclined. I’m really trying to paint a bigger picture. We’re either all in the same boat, all 300 million of us, or we’re in a boat with just ourselves or our families or our social groups. There are pros and cons of either philosophy. If you’re in one of the latter boats, then kids dying like this or old interstate bridges collapsing are always going to happen.
That’s awful. I couldn’t imagine what this woman is going through. She deserves sympathy and mental help for the obvious guilt and anguish she has. She doesn’t deserve prosecution. I can’t understand why no one ever seems to care about the safety or well being of the children of poor families, no matter how hardworking and dedicated to their children they are. The only time people seem to care is in the aftermath. If that lady asked any one of the people so intent on labeling her as a bad mother who didn’t deserve her children in the first place to watch her children, would they have? No. They have no right to judge or make her feel worse. She lost her children. Her children who she obviously loved very deeply. They have no right.
–Dragon
Hawk read me this story and I felt for this woman. He didn’t mention her skin color; it’s irrelevant to my opinion on the matter. I think she thought she was doing the right thing. I don’t know why she didn’t just say “then fire me” or bring the kids in to her workplace and say “deal with it or let me go home” but I imagine it’s b/c those options didn’t occur to her. Her children were the ages of my children. I can’t imagine the level of her grief.
I think it’s a class and education issue. I think basic parenting should be a topic in health classes in school.
this is a terrible story. i agree that it’s probably not a race but a class issue. there is still too little affordable daycare for working single moms here in germany, too, but things look like they might be on the way up. what annoys me is that it’s an ultra-conservative minister for family affairs who’s collecting votes for this now, while the former government seems to have failed in this.
women shouldn’t have to get into a bind like that, having to feed their children with their job and risking everything not to get fired from that job. it opens doors for all kinds of other exploitations, too, unpaid overtimes, sexual harassment, whatever. this has to change.