harrump.

4 Jan

Nothing to say lately.

Really, nothing at all. And I haven’t really missed it. I don’t know if it’s the lithium, or the weather, or being at home, but I have no words running through me, no desire to splatter myself across the face of the computer. I am empty, and content with it.

Which leads me to wonder if I’ll keep this up much longer. I know I’ve been saying this on and off the last few months-I keep pondering it to myself, wondering if I want to bother, if the stress of trying to write something meaningful is really worth it. Anymore…I don’t know.

It might just be the winter doldrums. All these snowbanks remind me of being a kid, digging into the piles and making forts you could hide from the wind in. Shelter from the storm, warmth even in the cold. It might be the fact that I’m not longer a mother to babies-parenting children is vastly different from babies, and it just doesn’t seem as interesting or as writable. Shall I talk about how white trash it is when my (almost) 3 year old mutters “What the fuck?”? Shall we chat about how absolutely unreasonable my four year old can be lately? This things don’t interest me right now-they infuriate me.

Add to this the fact that my “vacation” has consisted of my children being glued to my ass, and people from work “respecting” my vacation as I work during it. I’m just not very in to anything at the moment, aside from reading and playing this stupidly addictive game I downloaded.

How are any of you keeping up appearances and continuing to write?

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13 Responses to “harrump.”

  1. Jennifer January 4, 2008 at 10:48 am #

    I’m not. I don’t have anything to say either.

    Oh, and whey powder does indeed taste like ass. But honestly it tastes better than meat. :p

  2. thordora January 4, 2008 at 11:04 am #

    I think I’d rather eat meat.

  3. Hannah January 4, 2008 at 12:18 pm #

    I didn’t think I was keeping up appearances, really… I’ve been sure for a couple of months now that my blog has degenerated into self-pity.

    You’re very kind to imply that I have indeed been writing things worth reading… perhaps all the snow is making you delusional?

  4. Netter January 4, 2008 at 1:19 pm #

    I’ve been keeping up non-appearance. I feel bad about it, but not too much.

  5. Marcy January 4, 2008 at 1:48 pm #

    I write when I feel like it, about what I feel like. Whence comes this sense of obligation? Take a break if you want, write if you want, who cares about what anyone else wants? It’s YOUR BLOG.

  6. Nikita January 4, 2008 at 2:45 pm #

    So are you going to tell us what game you downloaded? If we don’t have anything to say we might as well kill some braincells on addictive computer games. 🙂

  7. bine January 4, 2008 at 2:52 pm #

    i feel similar. i can’t write about what’s really on my mind these days because too many people who know us personally or professionally look into my blog now and then, and i don’t want them to know about all our private problems.
    on the other side i don’t feel like writing neat little entertaining posts because my mind is elsewhere. i might give it up altogether, or take a break.
    some of it is winter blues, i’m sure, but i just can’t find the motivation.

    take a break if you feel like you don’t have much to say. nobody says you have to blog every day. you may feel you have something to say when the new leaves appear. i’ll be watching my feed reader.

  8. amateurish January 4, 2008 at 4:31 pm #

    Having a hard time due to work not letting me slack and post. Ok no more commenting, must back to work…

  9. Nat January 4, 2008 at 6:13 pm #

    The bloggins slowed down on this end too. Inspirating is lacking.

  10. sweetsalty kate January 4, 2008 at 8:19 pm #

    It says something that you strive to be meaningful. Out here, that’s uncommon, and a good thing.

    I’m feeling much the same way, wondering what I would do with all the time spent blogging, reading blogs, commenting on flickr, the whole social networking gig, no matter which venue. What if I spent that time exercising, or writing something profitable, or, best yet, sleeping instead of lingering until 2 AM?

    (notice I didn’t say “I could be spending time with my family”, because I think like you, I come here and to my own space to decompress, to just absorb things without being incessantly zerberted, as much as I love zerberts… so all the other things I could be doing are self-centered too, but in a more productive way than blogging.)

    Want to go on a internet detox with me? Let’s say, no personal computer time at all on Tuesdays, Thursdays or weekends, and only two hours maximum on the other days, and only when the kids are in bed. Before you know we’ll both be frigging Nobel Peace Prize winners or something, with all that spare time.

    Of course, we’ll need to start a website to track our progress, and to keep connected, to encourage each other. Comments would be cool too, so we could feel a part of something bigger. And of course we’ll have to install Statcounter, just because…

    ahem.

  11. thordora January 4, 2008 at 8:24 pm #

    or we could just track it in excel, and it would give me an excuse to finally learn some SQL and create a db….

    sigh…

    it’s a problem isn’t it.

  12. crunchy January 5, 2008 at 2:40 pm #

    I know….I keep hoping I will have a strong opinion on SOMETHING other than me being sad and at home to talk about.

    It just seems so boring to me.
    I love that people have and are caring about me (you too)…but you worry about putting too much out there and sounding just pathetic.

  13. radical mama January 7, 2008 at 10:45 am #

    I’m not. 🙂

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