Crash Course in Two Year Old

16 Apr

I need help.

Both of my children are driving us insane. Two children who are normally mild mannered, polite and well behaved have morphed into some thing else.

Vivian has suddenly turned into a whiny, snivelling irritant.

Rosalyn has turned into the usual 2 year old monster.

Our attempts are correcting this have failed, since we are entering totally unknown territory. I have my suspicions that Vivian’s problem are rooted in the fact that Ros gets more attention (mostly negative), but that doesn’t fix the problem. Vivian is fine until she doesn’t get her way, or someone leaves. Rosalyn is fine so long as you CONSTANTLY distract her. Sit down to, oh, I don’t know, PEE, and she’s tries to burn the house down. Again, I think it may be an attention issue, since she is also attached to me in ways that can’t be normal.

So before I google my brains out, I figured I’d put the call out, and ask for some advice. What worked for you? What didn’t? What would you have done, should you have done?

And I’ve already thought about both selling and adopting them out.

13 Responses to “Crash Course in Two Year Old”

  1. Heather April 16, 2007 at 2:53 pm #

    I don’t know what to tell you about Vivian.

    Rosalyn reminds me of what I like to call “Evil Freyja”.

    Evil Freyja was out this weekend. I know it’s the age. I know. It doesn’t stop me from wanting to lock myself in the bathroom with the bottle of Jose Cuervo and self-medicate into oblivion, though. Naughty. Tantruming. Refusing to nap. Refusing to eat. Hemming. Hawing. Being up my butt every single damn second. Literally, with her hands right up in my personal area. The child has no idea what “personal space” means. I try to explain it and she just looks at me like I have three heads.

    I feel completely ineffective. Nothing I do has any bearing. Unfortunately, I could spank her all day and it wouldn’t make a damn bit of difference – she is STUBBORN and defiant. Like her mother.

    So yeah. No advice. But commiseration, oh yes, I have that for you in buckets. I think anybody who says they never have had thoughts of beating their two year old (no matter how fleeting or small the thought) is a dirty liar. That’s why children are cute – it saves them from being thrown to the wolves when they hit two-and-a-half.

  2. Jen April 16, 2007 at 3:03 pm #

    When Lucy was 2, we had daily screaming arguments like 3 days a week for months over…everything. Because I wanted her to do something. And she did not want to. I have no advice because I’m pretty sure the only thing that helped either of us was for me to get out of the house without her. But we did make it through, and the whining irritant phase is definitely better than ‘the look you in the eye and misbehave’ phase. I don’t know how you deal with both at once.

  3. thordora April 16, 2007 at 3:06 pm #

    A LOT of it is it’s been so freaking shitty here that we can’t go for walks-it’s been snowing, raining, generally CRAP weather, and you can’t go far in it. We’re all stir crazy and bored.

    Pray for sun.

  4. bine April 16, 2007 at 6:25 pm #

    my friend has a two-year old girl who has just turned into a the usual two-year old monster, throwing tantrums has become her daily habit. my friend says the only thing that works with her baby girl monster is to refuse her the attention she’s obviously yelling for until she calms down, alone in her room. she (my friend) was terrified at first about that somehow antiquated piece of education recommended by her grandmother, but it’s the only thing that works so far.
    i agree that viv is probably trying to get her share of attention since ros is asking for so much right now. do you have a chance to split the girls between the two of you now and then? maybe viv needs someone all for herself from time to time, with no one to distract. that worked with my godchild, a sunny and goodnatured boy who suddenly became whiny and cranky and started wetting his bed again, after getting a very demanding little sister. he got “daddy hours” as often as his parents could manage, and his moods evened considerably.

  5. Schadenfreude April 16, 2007 at 8:37 pm #

    Lots of alcohol for me, the Mrs. and Captain Destructo — smooths out all the rough edges. At least that’s my fantasy.

    Right now its just a matter of sucking it up.

  6. Jason Dufair April 16, 2007 at 10:01 pm #

    Mine (Alyssa and Ian) are the bicker twins. I’m going to take Kat’s advice and tie them together until they get along. I had to raise my voice with all three of them tonight. I don’t like doing it, but it does the trick sometimes to remind them of who is in charge.

  7. HeatherKae April 17, 2007 at 8:08 am #

    I’ve been looking into boarding schools for my 5 year old. Sadly, it seems we are just not in the income bracket to pawn off our children. So I’ve settled for reading Raising the Spirited Child for like the 12th time.

    I hate that book. I think the next time she pushes me past the brink, I’m going to make HER read it.

    So there’s my advice. Read parenting books to them. Or, if you can afford it, send them off to Switzerland.

  8. radicalmama April 17, 2007 at 9:17 am #

    That’s tough. A and Em are the exact same. What works best for A when she is feeling neglected is some alone time with mom or dad. For Em (the 2yo), it’s the bedroom. She is allowed to make all the annoying noise she wants up there and come back down when she is finished. I have zero tolerance for kids who subject the entire family to chaos and temper tantrums.

  9. thordora April 17, 2007 at 9:46 am #

    I’m starting Viv on that road-you want to whine or cry for no reason? Feel free to do so in your room-come out when you’re calm. It’s hard though, since I’m not home most of the day.

    I started using a squirt bottle on Ros this morning. she did NOT like that, so I have high hopes for this method.

  10. karriew April 17, 2007 at 3:53 pm #

    I’m all for letting Max and Ros just duke it out someplace quiet while we get hammered.

    That’s just the kind of parental advice I deal in these days. 😀

  11. Heather April 17, 2007 at 6:39 pm #

    I’m soooo in. Toddler WWF!

  12. thordora April 18, 2007 at 7:01 am #

    I still can’t get Haikoop! out of my head…. snicker

  13. Schadenfreude April 19, 2007 at 5:31 pm #

    LOL 🙂

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